


The Only Home She Ever Wanted

by writingramblr



Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Humor, Angst and Porn, Changing Tenses, Cheesy, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, I Don't Even Know, Possible OOC-ness, Shameless Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-20
Updated: 2015-03-20
Packaged: 2018-03-18 17:18:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3577584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writingramblr/pseuds/writingramblr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Maybe everything should be harder for the first female Kingsman, maybe everything should be different. </p><p>But Roxy doesn't really have time to care what should be, when she's too busy doing everything she shouldn't.</p><p>That includes falling in love with the exact opposite sort of man she should.</p><p>But sometimes the heart does what it wants, and sometimes that sort of thinking is a complete waste of time. </p><p>But sometimes it isn't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Only Home She Ever Wanted

**Author's Note:**

> first Kingsman fic, and HOLY DAMN did it get long and out of hand.  
> It's also very smutty, and partly due to an extremely dirty dream I had just this morning, and i wanted to put a voice to it. And this was the most receptive fandom and OTP of the armada i had to choose from.  
> I hope you enjoy!  
> Please be kind.  
> I only saw the movie once (but would watch many more times) so if anyone's OOC, that's why. 
> 
> ALSO:Unbetaed and multi tense, mostly on purpose.

_It feels right._

_More than that._

_She feels home._

_It’s dangerously cheesy and quite ridiculously vulgar, but for Roxy, (or as she’s known inside Kingsman, Lancelot,) when she lets Merlin slide home inside of her, she feels it._

_He fits perfectly, and he feels delicious._

_Before becoming a Kingsman, she knew she should have blushed at even the thought of it, sleeping with a coworker, and one she would be seeing on a regular basis._

_But now?_

_When she’s finished with a mission and she knows the last thing to do before giving her report to Galahad is to organize the exact words she wants to say with Merlin, she let’s herself picture it._

_Merlin’s face as she sinks onto his gorgeous cock, and the groan that’ll escape his lips when she’s in place._

***

The first time she did anything more than just her usual flirt with him, she’d never imagined an elegant gentleman of his age and stature would turn so red. She’d also never seen him without his glasses, and she found she almost preferred when he took them off in front of her, almost always in exasperation at something she’d done off the books.

His ears, his forehead, even his neck flushed when she smirked and told him about what she’d been dreaming of since their first meeting.

For most of _that_ mission, he’d been inside her already, well, his voice in her ear, guiding her along, until it was time for her and Eggsy to save the world.

It’d been a piece of cake.

While Eggsy had been getting his rocks off with a certain princess, Roxy had gone straight to Kingsman headquarters and grabbed a few hours of shut eye.

Just the right amount to end with a spectacularly sexy dream before waking.

She had all the rotten luck, in that all her previous possessions had been confiscated and kept in storage until she either passed or failed.

They were still locked up tight in a certain genius’s lab.

One item in particular she knew would have assisted her perfectly the morning after just such a dream.

So as soon as she was able, and no longer throbbing with need, she’d gone and showered and dressed in her new suit, and went to pay Merlin a visit.

***

He’d only just arrived back himself, having flown with Eggsy, and made certain the young protégé of Galahad’s had been alright.

Roxy personally thought that Eggsy had been a bit too babied, but she wasn’t about to contradict her boss’s orders.

The click of her heels indicated her arrival a bit sooner than she would have liked, and the disapproving click of Merlin’s tongue told her everything before he spoke,

“Lancelot, you should know that the element of surprise is your most valuable weapon. After the deadly ones you hide on your person of course.”

Roxy bit her lip, and fought the urge to groan in annoyance and slight frustration at his voice.

As delightful as it had been to have in her ear, she swore he practiced his tone until it was practically of a panty melting timbre.

The reply that was on the tip of her tongue was quite sarcastic, and it was only the reminding thought of _why she was there_ that kept her from unleashing it.

She was certain it was in her file, the fact that she’d had an affair with her second step-father, and thus marked the attraction to older men, but she was rather hoping that Merlin had read it, and would remember. Therefore, he’d have no reason to be shocked when she actually made more than a verbal move.

If indeed he wanted the same thing she did.

“That’s why I’m here actually.”

Merlin looked surprised, and his hand paused in its journey to pull off his glasses, to focus on her,

“You wanted to pick up another gadget? I’m afraid they’re all in the shop. I haven’t got anything of use here.”

Roxy rolled her eyes, and didn’t care how impatient she looked as she crossed her arms in front of her chest, pushing the delicate blue silk of her blouse to the breaking point over her breasts.

“But I know you have keys.”

Merlin still looked lost, and for him, it was a rarely used expression. Roxy patted herself mentally on the back at keeping his eyebrows in such an unusual position.

“Keys?”

Roxy fought to keep her own expression neutral, but her mouth disobeyed, and she licked her lips, as her eyelashes blinked slightly more rapidly than normal,

“Yes, to a storage box. You’re holding all my stuff. There’s something I desperately need.”

It was another few moments before Merlin finally arrived on the same page, and he nodded quickly,

“Of course. Your luggage. I wouldn’t think you would want any of it. You have everything you could need in your new quarters.”

Roxy hummed in disagreement,

“Not _everything._ Unless there’s room in the Kingsman budget for a new vibrator for new recruits.”

Roxy held her breath as Merlin realized what she’d just said.

The way his shoulders froze and the catch in his voice when he replied told her enough.

“Uh, of course. There’s been no such need.”

Roxy tapped her heel at him,

“Because?”

Merlin sighed, and she saw him reach up unsubtly to loosen his sweater from his neck.

“There’s never been a female Kingsman before.”

“Ah. Well rules were made to be broken after all. Tell me Merlin, is there a rule against fraternization between Kingsmen?”

He’d not noticed, lost in his own daze as he looked for the specific key she would need, that Roxy had made her move, and was now only a few inches away from him.

If she’d been on orders to kill him, or indeed anyone who found themselves her prey, he’d have been dead before he could turn around.

As it was, she was almost hoping he’d call her on her brilliant move.

“Well as I said, there had been only male Kingsman, so…”

Roxy huffed in annoyance, and drew his attention back, so that when he _did_ turn, he was only a breath away.

“Lancelot what-?”

Roxy placed her hands on his shoulders, feeling the tensed muscles beneath the coarse wool fabric, and squeezed none too gently.

“Really now, you make a girl feel unwanted with all this babbling. So answer my question please. Can I kiss you, or is that against the rules?”

Merlin’s eyes, which to Roxy resembled a fantastical image of sunshine through a forest, such a unique shade of green that they were, widened at her words and he was actually silent before her.

The great Merlin, speechless.

Roxy took his non-answer for a yes.

***

That was the beginning of the end for them both.

Well sure, that was a horribly negative way to look at things, but when one was in the business of saving the world, foiling mad men and stopping deadly plans, there weren’t many things one could take for granted.

Always coming back alive was one of those things.

After all, Galahad had been the best and bravest, and he’d ended up with a bullet in the brain, a grave that read ‘Harry Hart,’ and a closed casket service.

Merlin knew every time he watched Lancelot, or Roxy, as he called her when they were alone; leave Kingsman headquarters she might never come back. Or worse, she’d return in a body bag.

Therefore, he’d wasted little of their time arguing against what they both wanted.

Craved even.

Oh yes, he’d read her file.

Back and forth, and twice more, after being told the results of the recruiting.

He didn’t shock easily, and reading about her past affairs with married men, and even her own step-father once, hadn’t bothered him.

But it certainly had explained a lot when she’d begun to drop by his lab more and more.

He’d only met her originally once after Galahad had briefed her.

It felt wrong to call him that.

There would be a new Galahad soon after all.

Merlin smiled, remembering the conversation he’d had with Roxy about who it should be.

They both knew who was more than qualified, but the only question was, would he say yes to it?

***

Before Roxy had made her move on him, Merlin had imagined that she would have gone after her fellow Kingsman to be, Eggsy Unwin. But luckily, she hadn’t been attracted to him like that.

 

Instead, she’d gone for him.

She’d hunted him, seduced him, and won him.

He’d been ensnared by her from the start.

Eager to see how a female Kingsman performed in the field.

She’d set a high bar.

She was also an incredible lover.

That wasn’t quite right.

They were lovers, but it went further than that.

He knew it was probably foolish, and a notion that belonged in the kinds of books a normal woman her age would read.

She was half his age after all.

But he’d never felt a closer bond to anyone he’d met before.

In his line of work, he didn’t meet a lot of women anyway.

He counted himself lucky that she’d done what she had.

In some ways, a lot of ways, she had bigger balls than any man he’d ever known as well.

She always took what she wanted, and never apologized.

But he’d been the one who caved first, who told her, the utter truth that was seared into his soul, burned onto his heart.

Two months in, and he’d said it.

“I love you.”

He hadn’t really planned to ever admit it.

But once the words escaped, he hadn’t wanted to take them back.

Roxy had looked at him a bit funny, and the fact she was just preparing to lift away from him, for she’d been riding him as he’d sat in his desk chair, smack dab in the middle of the lab, where anyone could have walked in on them, if Roxy hadn’t locked the door, he’d checked twice, and he’d felt her muscles clench around him.

“Okay.”

“You don’t need to say it back,”

He’d shrugged, and waved a hand around, before snarling it back in her hair, and pulling her in for a kiss.

But she knew he’d been lying without a word.

“No. I want to say it too. But when I mean it.”

He nodded, and then she started moving again, and his last rational thought vanished.

But he did.

He loved her.

Against all odds.

***

Their first time Roxy had almost laughed, but restrained herself, because past experience told her men couldn’t perform if they thought you were laughing at them, whether because they were self conscious about their size, shape or whatever.

Roxy thought Merlin’s cock was ideal.

She’d been surprised that he was uncut, and she’d certainly run through the previous dicks she’d encountered in her mind, and compared him to the repertoire.

But she never said anything of the sort aloud.

For his part, he hadn’t acted shy, but she wasn’t a Kingsman for nothing.

She could read people easily, and the man who she’d set her sights on was a piece of cake.

He sat in his desk chair, faced away from the various viewing screens he usually stared at most of the day, and had undone his pants, but refused to remove any actual items of clothing before she did, other than his glasses.

Lucky for them both he was near sighted, and there was no danger of him missing a thing.

Roxy decided it was only fair.

She could already picture him taking her over his desk, but the anticipation was delicious.

So she did the most work.

She kicked off her heels, and almost missed the pout on his face, but with a smile she promised,

“Another time.”

He looked somewhat mollified, and judging by the visible tenting in his boxers, was looking forward to their time as much as she was.

At times she found herself wondering what it was like. To have such obvious arousal, compared to her, a woman, who could hide the desire for anything sexual as easily as her thoughts.

She’d never had anyone long enough to ask something like that.

Not that Merlin was to be any sort of long term thing.

Still, part of her wondered.

The look he was giving her told her plainly that she was thinking too much, and she needed to get her head back in the game, so to speak.

“Do you plan to just sit there all night?”

Merlin grinned up at her, for even without her deadly pumps, she still towered over him slightly as he leaned back in his leather chair.

“I might. I rather like the view.”

Roxy smirked.

“Oh this thing? It’s hideous. I think I’ll take it off. Toss it in a corner.”

She let her fingers dance along the hem of her dress, and Merlin’s eyes immediately dropped to drink in the revealed skin.

The dress wasn’t ugly by any stretch of the imagination, but it was a bit uncomfortable and beginning to make her sweat.

She’d had it tailor made to imitate Merlin’s favorite sweater, red and black plaid.

It was in perfect contrast to Eggsy’s civilian jacket, black and yellow plaid, which Roxy always teased him about resembling a bumble bee in.

Merlin hadn’t yet told her to leave off him, and let him be, but she hoped he wouldn’t. Nothing brightened her day like making fun of her fellow Kingsman in training.

Once she’d gotten rid of her dress, she watched how Merlin reacted to her underwear, or rather lack of.

She’d forgone a bra, and what she lacked in the ‘huge knocker’ category, she made up for everywhere else.

After all, she’d once heard that more than a handful could be too much.

Merlin seemed rather stuck on something, two something’s.

How predictable.

She smirked again.

“See something you like?”

Merlin exhaled, and Roxy saw his cock twitch in his boxers. Suddenly her mouth watered.

“You are stunning. And you don’t even have a knife to my neck.”

Roxy fought the urge to laugh.

She’d had an assignment the week before where she’d been a honey trap, and stabbed a man right after he’d gotten her top off.

The irony was hilarious.

She’d been originally ordered to poison him while he slept, after, well, they’d fucked, but he’d escalated her plans when he’d pulled her bra and shirt off, and thrown the garments aside. The poison had been in a special pocket in her bra, which she’d planned to leave on for the duration of the evening, and she’d been forced to improvise.

“I hope you don’t consider these pants to be among your favorites…”

Roxy dropped to her knees before Merlin could even reply, and she palmed him through his boxers.

The strained gasp that escaped his lips gave her the answer she needed.

She could already feel his pre-cum soaking through the thin fabric, and it only made her wetter.

The scrap of black lace that could barely be called underwear that she wore was ruined by now, and she couldn’t decide if she wanted Merlin to take them off with his teeth, or if she wanted him to watch her take them off.

She decided to shelve the idea, and relieve some of his tension.

After all, he’d been working far longer and had less chance to act out any fantasies.

Unless….

“Did you rub one out while I was on mission?”

The question had caught him off guard; she could tell by the way his relaxed face shifted towards a serious expression.

She slipped her hand inside his boxers, and he groaned.

“Yes.”

She pursed her lips, and clicked her tongue,

“Naughty Merlin. I should have known. You liked watching me work.”

He hummed in agreement, and she flicked her thumb over the head of his cock, feeling the muscles dance beneath her fingers as she gripped his shaft.

The slow steady strokes were clearly winning him over, and she didn’t even need more lubricant than what his cock provided.

It was ridiculous now, just how much she wanted to taste him.

“You do always excel in the field Lancelot.”

Roxy smiled warmly,

“Thank you Merlin. That means a lot. Of course, right now, I’d rather hear some compliments on my skills tonight.”

As she watched, his hands moved to grip the armrests until his knuckles turned white, and she saw him inhale a shaky breath,

“Well, you’ve got incredible technique, and that…feels amazing.”

Roxy moved her hand, shifting her grip so that her forefinger and thumb locked around his shaft, and she tightened it with every upward stroke,

“You know you can touch me right? I’m not going to bitch at you if you want to hold my head while I go down on you.”

Merlin’s eyes opened wide, as if he hadn’t realized he’d closed them, just moments before Roxy pushed her hand down his shaft and took him into her mouth.

She continued to tease the head of his cock with her tongue, and when he finally did as she’d asked, and she felt a hand grip in her hair; she fought the urge to smile.

It would involve her teeth getting too close to his skin, and she doubted that would be as good for him as the sucking and occasional flicking of her tongue was.

When she felt his muscles tense in his upper thigh, which she’d left her free hand to lie on; she pulled back with an obscene pop, and beamed up at him.

He was extremely out of breath, and his forehead gleamed with sweat.

“You, aren’t bitchy.”

Roxy laughed,

“Is that all you got out of what I said? You’re adorable.”

Merlin would have surely been more indignant at being addressed as such, but considering how close she’d brought him to orgasm, he was pretty much incapable of looking anything short of aroused beyond reason.

Ignoring the ache in her knees, Roxy got back to her feet, and moved to sit on his lap, still teasingly inches away from touching his now surely painfully hard cock, which almost looked shiny with wetness.

She licked her lips as she looked down at him, and almost missed his reverent whisper,

“Can I take these off now?”

Merlin’s hand slide from her hair to caress her bare skin, from her navel to her left breast, and then back to the edge of her panties.

“Uh, yeah, I thought you’d never ask.”

“I hope you don’t like these.”

Roxy tilted her head and lifted her hands up to entwine around his neck, drawing him in for a searing kiss, ending with a small nibble of his bottom lip, before replying with a breathy,

“Not really.”

He grinned, and for the first time Roxy stopped wondering if he could smile, and then realized she wanted to be the only one to make him do so,

“Good.”

His fingers dug into her skin, gripping the sides of the fabric, and with a swift movement, he tore them right off.

She shifted on his lap, letting him remove them completely, and then smirked.

“My my, looks like someone is a bit eager.”

Merlin practically growled at her,

“Do you want me here, or do you want to be bent over my desk? Decide, now.”

Roxy felt her eyes nearly cross as she focused on his own fiery gaze.

Now he was taking charge?

She was more than fine with that.

There was no question of awkward things like condoms or weird sprays. The scar on her upper arm told them that she’d been getting the shot for over three years.

Even if he hadn’t read her file, he’d have known the facts.

Nothing was stopping her from lifting up slightly and slipping right onto him.

But the fact was, she wanted him to do it.

“Here.” She breathed out, and then his hands moved, sliding under her hips, and doing just as she’d dreamed.

His strength was surprising, for someone who wasn’t a field agent.

She was no petite flower, and no damsel in distress to be carried away.

But he maneuvered her like she weighed nothing.

The gasp forced from her lungs at the feel of him inside her was involuntary, but judging by his answering groan, it was more than welcome.

She wasn’t usually a vocal sort during sex, but their coupling was unique in more ways than one.

She’d never fucked a man in his workplace, and she’d never tried sex in a chair.

It wasn’t easy, but it was extremely worth the effort.

She could easily watch his face as he could hers.

The position was excellent for putting her closer than she’d predicted, and even without asking, she felt one of his hands leave her hip to brush a thumb over her folds, finding her clit in half the time any previous man she’d been with had.

Then again, genius. Someone who finally knew as much about the female body as she did.

Her nails might have dug into his sweater so hard that she’d ripped a few stitches, but she didn’t care.

She figured he didn’t either.

But what felt like seconds before she could have come, he stopped moving.

Between gritted teeth, she spoke,

“What the fuck?”

Merlin smirked at her, the fucker, and she almost felt proud.

“I think my foot’s fallen asleep.”

Roxy coughed out a laugh, and he wiggled his eyebrows.

“Desk please?”

Roxy nodded, and managed to get to her feet, reluctant to move off him in the first place, but admitting the awkward truth had clearly taken a lot of courage.

“OK. Next time I think it’s a good idea to get into your lap, I’ll think through the logistics. I promise.”

Merlin shrugged, and his hands found her hips again easily once she’d hopped up onto the wooden surface,

“No need to apologize.”

Roxy cocked a brow at him,

“Did you hear me say I’m sorry?”

Merlin winked at her,

“Yep.”

“Oh…you shouldn’t have done that.”

***

That first night, Roxy had been merciless in the end. She’d not let him come until he’d finally begged. Once she’d gotten dressed again, sans underwear, he’d asked her back to his quarters, and she’d said yes.

They’d fucked twice more before the stroke of midnight and by then Roxy had decided to forgive him for being so sarcastic about it.

The next time they met up for more than just business was a bit less than two months later, but far longer than either of them could have wanted.

That was when Merlin had told her the words she thought she’d never hear from another man’s lips.

She’d thought she’d imagined them but he repeated it and sold her on the idea.

The third time they came together was another month later, and she caved.

She answered his not-question.

***

 

Roxy had just finished a mission halfway around the globe, and she’d managed to get enough sun to turn her skin a slight golden hue.

“Here I thought English girls didn’t tan, they only burned. You proved me wrong.”

Roxy rolled her eyes,

“Just for that, I’m not going to give you your present.”

Merlin perked up, and he looked at her searchingly, but she didn’t reveal anything she hadn’t planned to him.

“Oh please. I’m sorry. Honest I am. You know as well as I do that you look twice as stunning. Bit of sun does wonders.”

“You know I already heard that dumb joke from Eggsy.”

Merlin snorted,

“Oh so he got one up on you then? Usually I hear you’ve beaten him into the ground.”

Roxy sighed,

“Not half true. He holds his own.”

Merlin stepped closer to her, and one of his hands found its way around her waist,

“Can I have my present? I really am sorry. I swear it. Cross my heart…”

Roxy fought the urge to roll her eyes again, and when Merlin pulled her in for a kiss, she didn’t fight him.

It felt good.

Felt right.

Her lips were chapped from the excess sun, and a bit cool from her recent drink of ice water, but that only made the kiss better, for Merlin seemed to always have soft and warm skin, which extended to his mouth.

His kiss only made her thirst for more, but not water.

She needed to taste his skin, touch him, and feel the bruising touch of his hands on her hips as he drove into her.

She pulled away with another sigh, and heard him say something.

“What?”

He coughed,

“Oh nothing sorry. Just mumbling to myself.”

“Hmm?”

“You don’t want to know an old man’s musings.”

Roxy frowned,

“Sure I do. What old man?”

Merlin smiled, and she swore she could feel her heart melt at the sight. Just as she’d hoped, he never did it unless he was around her.

Well, except for rare occasions he was witness to her ruthless teasing of Eggsy.

“Stop that. You flatter me. And you’ve no need. You already stole my virtue.”

Roxy rolled her eyes,

“For god’s sake Merlin. What is it?”

“I just, I wondered if there was any chance, if you wanted to have dinner with me tonight.”

Roxy frowned again,

“Yeah of course. I’m half starved.”

Merlin coughed,

“No, I mean out. Out in the real world. Not here in headquarters. As a real couple. On a date.”

“Oh.”

Roxy was sure that she looked stunned, blindsided, and that was how she felt.

It wasn’t that she didn’t consider Merlin as someone…someone…special…but they’d never put it to terms.

Never said what they were.

After all, she didn’t really know.

But she knew what they weren’t.

They weren’t friends, they weren’t lovers, and they weren’t enemies or acquaintances.

They were coworkers and she was a spy and he was a genius.

But together?

He was still looking at her, waiting for a reply.

It seemed to be caught in her throat.

So she nodded.

His eyes lit up like Christmas.

“Excellent. Meet me back here in half an hour?”

Roxy quirked her lips, but didn’t smile all the way,

“You know I can be changed in half that?”

Merlin gulped, actually gulped, and pulled away,

“I know. But I have to wrap up some things.”

Roxy shrugged,

“Okay.”

The time passed quicker than she’d planned, and all she’d been doing was unpacking her arsenal and the few days clothing she’d taken.

The only thing fitting to wear was the dress she’d had on the night they’d first stepped across the line of nothing to something.

She paired the red and black dress with tights and plain black flats, just as practical as any other shoe, and half as deadly.

When she returned to the garage, Merlin was waiting for her, perched inside a sleek grey Lexus.

“That’s conspicuous.”

Merlin grinned up at her,

“I wanted something that said, ‘Date night.’”

“Um, alright.”

“Hop in.”

Roxy smirked,

“Does this mean we can deflower it after dinner?”

He chuckled and placed a hand on her thigh as he pulled out of the building, and led them out into the lights of London at night.

“Always so eager to play with my toys for the wrong reasons.”

Roxy sighed,

“Well if you’d decided to devote your talents to making sex toys, instead of helping spies protect the country, we’d have never met. So I suppose I can’t have everything.”

“No. You can’t.”

Roxy glanced at him from the corner of her eye, and she could have sworn she heard something strongly resembling bitterness in his tone.

It wasn’t until they’d returned to headquarters, after indeed deflowering the stunning car that she realized what the night had been.

Unofficially, it was the one year anniversary of their meeting.

Of her first having been knighted as a Kingsman so to speak, and the date the week before her first mission.

‘Time flies when one’s having so much fun,’ she thought to herself.

Back in his lab, she found herself reliving their first time as she eyed the desk and chair, and then all she could see was the screens beyond that.

She imagined Merlin having to watch her on mission, and the thoughts turned dark.

What if he saw her die?

What if the headquarters were compromised and instead of his reassuring voice in her ear, she could only hear static while out in the field?

She wasn’t quite sure how either scenario would play out, but as much as she hated them both, they could easily happen at any time.

Well, perhaps not the latter.

Unless Eggsy turned out to be a double agent in the morning, in which case she’d break his pretty neck.

“Roxy?”

Merlin’s voice broke through her musings, and she turned to him wordlessly, but he could see she’d started to cry.

That never happened to her.

But now.

“What’s wrong?”

He was at her side in a heartbeat, and she was in his arms in less than a second.

“Nothing.”

“Don’t treat me like an idiot. I know your tells.”

Roxy sighed.

Of course he could tell when she was lying.

“Okay. Everything.”

“What’s that?”

His breath was warm on the side of her neck, and she wished it wouldn’t have been too obvious to drag him over to the chair and simply distract him as she’d done on so many missions with marks.

But Merlin wasn’t anything like that.

“I’ve finally got something to lose.”

The words nearly stuck in her throat, and she felt him tense around her, but he remained silent, letting her continue her thoughts,

“I’ve never loved someone so much.”

“Now you know how I’ve been feeling the last few months.”

Roxy managed a weak laugh,

“Really? I never pictured you the sappy sort.”

A slight pinch to her forearm was all the reprimand she got,

“When it comes to a certain Kingsman, I am head over heels. Mind you, not many geniuses are like me, so perhaps I’m unique.”

Roxy smiled, and she pulled him in for a kiss before letting out a shaky breath.

“So there it is. The thing that’s kept me awake nights.”

Merlin frowned.

“Don’t tell me you’ve lost sleep over this sort of worry?”

“Not much.”

“Any is too much.”

Roxy nodded,

“You’re right.”

“We’ll be okay.”

Roxy looked at him, and her hand stroked the side of his face, her fingertips catching on the day’s stubble,

“What are we exactly?”

Merlin exhaled slowly, looking thoughtful,

“We’re together. Right?”

Roxy nodded again.

“Isn’t that enough?”

“Of course.”

“You didn’t want to be Mrs. Merlin or anything like that did you?”

Roxy made a face, and he nodded.

“I thought not.”

“But I certainly wouldn’t mind a bit of a celebration on our anniversary.”

Merlin cocked a brow,

“Does it involve my present?”

Roxy rolled her eyes,

“I knew you wouldn’t drop that. No it wouldn’t, unless you consider cufflinks a sex toy.”

Merlin actually seemed speechless for a moment, pretending to think perhaps, and Roxy fought the urge to laugh at his expression.

“No. Not really.”

“I thought not.”

***

Whether or not they made it to a second anniversary, Roxy didn’t care. What she did care about was Merlin. That was enough for her.

She felt safe and secure in his arms, more than she ever could with her many secret weapons. She was loved and needed by him, deeper than any other bond she could have formed.

He was her home.

Together or not.

Merlin and Lancelot didn’t need a promise of tomorrow, when they had the proof of their love in their hearts.

***

**END**

 

 

 


End file.
